Getting My La Pasadita On

I used to have a tradition called Hot Dog Fridays that featured Hot Doug's. That eventually evolved into Taco Fridays featuring La Pasadita.

Tonight, I wanted to revisit those times and attempted to emulate La Pasadita's taco. It definitely wasn't the same, but it was damn tasty.

Word to the wise, do not attempt to drink eisbocks and be functional. Those joints are mad strong (and delicious).

Also, tomorrow I'm getting my left arm all kinds of illustrated, and I'm having doubts. Unfortunately, the sugar cube was dropped, leaving room for the robot parts, cheeseburger, and stick of butter only. Apparently, this whole exercise will take about 20 hours. Yay?

Watchmen tomorrow.

In Fatter News ...

I'm slowly reverting back to my former habits. This morning I made waffles (approximately seven of them), and this evening I made chocolate chip cookies. I'm gonna stop fighting it; I was meant to have high LDL levels and intermittent chest pains from all the fat I consume.

For Schmoe Diggla's Mama's birthday, we hit Chi-Tung. People were dangerously close to food coma.

See? Jimmy has collapsed over his cookie.

My delicious fruit punch backwash remains untouched cuz I have
approximately 14 pounds of food in my stomach.

However, the random Asian food gods have some good news for me.
Perhaps they refer to a cholesterol test.

To keep the fat fattening, I plan on having a pepper crusted steak and a potato gratin tomorrow. That means I'll have meat, potatoes, and cream for dinner. Mmm ... food.

I guess this is a good enough space to make a random Alton Brown allusion. "Oh, bother."


Also, there are some bloggers out there doing wonderful things for food. Thank you.
Coconut & Lime
Closet Cooking - singlehandedly responsible for my love of orange root vegetables with blue cheese.
101 Cookbooks
Orthogonal Thought

Finally, the Fat Boys had it all figured out:

It's Been Over, But ...

I formally ended my flirtation with vegetarianism last Wednesday, but I failed to post my last meal, a spinach pie with pearled barley pilaf. Both were delicious and pretty adorable. Take a gander:



Catch me in about a week when I retool my diet to include a lot less butter and cream. Until then, strictly fashion, sci fi, and music.

Spaghetti in Mushroom & Spinach Cream Sauce - DAY EIGHT (?)

Let's make this quick. I spent the day out canoodling, so I had very little time or energy to prepare a meal. Pasta is always quick, and with a little care, tasty. So ...

Spaghetti in Mushroom & Spinach Cream Sauce
about 3 oz dry whole wheat spaghetti (1/4 box)
2 tbsp unsalted butter
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
3 tbsp flour
about 3 cups milk or half & half
1/4 cup mushrooms, sliced
2 cups spinach, drained
garlic
nutmeg, to taste
black pepper, to taste
salt, to taste
Parmesan cheese

Boil the spaghetti until al dente. Drain.

Sweat the mushrooms in olive oil and butter until soft. Add garlic and flour. Mix until lumps have disappeared. Slowly add milk and stir over low heat until the butter/flour paste disappears and sauce is smooth. Add spinach and season with nutmeg, pepper, and salt to taste. Mix with spaghetti, garnish with Parmesan, and eat.

I'm telling you. Bechamel is your best friend. With it, you can customize a pasta dish, start a soup, or create a casserole. There is no reason to ever buy a premade sauce when you can make your own in under ten minutes. It may seem fattening, but consider the awful crap you consume outside the house on a normal day. Horrible, right? Plus, it's only one meal.

Sweet Dumpling Squash w/ Gorgonzola & Creamed Spinach - DAY SEVEN

I was good over the weekend, rest assured. Even though I kicked it with the fam, I avoided meat, even when my order was messed up, and I was brought a big plate of beefy goodness. Anyway, on to the matter at hand.

I got the idea for the squash recipe from Kevin over at Closet Cooking. I'm a lot lazier than he is, so there was no way I was peeling and cubing anything. Instead I just baked it and covered it in cheese.









Sweet Dumpling Squash w/ Gorgonzola Cheese

1 Sweet Dumpling Squash
Gorgonzola cheese, crumbled
salt
pepper
olive oil

Preheat oven to 350. Wash squash, cut in half, and scoop out seeds. (Be careful; these things are tough and you can lose fingers.) Sprinkle with olive oil, salt, and pepper. Bake in 350 degree oven until soft, about 30 minutes. Remove from oven, sprinkle with cheese and return to heat until cheese is melted. That's it.

Very tasty, this squash may take the place of my favorite orange food, sweet potato. Loving the sweetness of the squash with the sourness/saltiness of the cheese.

Creamed Spinach

Spinach ( I have no idea of how to express this in a measurement, enough for two people)
1/2 medium onion, diced
1/2 clove garlic, diced
1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 tbsp cream cheese
1 tbsp sour cream
pepper
Adobo, salt, or other such seasoning

Unfortunately, I started with fresh spinach, so I had to wash and wash until it was clean. Fresh, frozen or otherwise, make sure your spinach is drained; however a bit of water is fine as it helps create the sauce.

Sweat onion in olive oil. Once it's become transparent, add garlic and spinach. After spinach wilts (fresh) or warms (frozen), add cream cheese and sour cream. Stir until cream cheese melts and is combined with sour cream. Season to taste and remove from heat. You're done.

Love this meal. Obviously, I'm unable to eat without cream being involved. So what? There are vegetables here, and, for the first time, some real color. Commend me, dammit! That other side dish you see is my spicy brown rice from last week. Still going strong, still tasty.

I also made some banana bread. One loaf for me (with chocolate chips and walnuts), and one for Schmoe Diggla (with chocolate chips only). If you're interested in the recipe I used, go here. I follow the recipe pretty closely with a few exceptions: I use half whole wheat pastry flour, half unbleached AP flour; I use butter-flavored shortening; I cut the sugar down by 75 percent; and I cut the recipe in half for two small loaves.



Audi/Outtie 5000

Broccoli Mushroom Pie and Spicy Brown Rice - DAY THREE

So I failed yesterday. Messing with my mother will have you full of beefy pork juice. However, I managed to get away with fishy poultry. (Not together, but I'm sayin'.) So today, I was back on track. I'm noticing a theme, though. My food tends to be beige as hell, which means I'm still working on getting color (read: vegetables) into my diet. Anyway ...









mushroom and broccoli pie ("we're chopping bra-co-lieeee!!!")

1 bag frozen broccoli (thawed or use fresh) 1 scallion, chopped about 10 medium mushroom, sliced about 1 cup cheeses (i used trader joe's quattro formaggio, white cheddar, and sharp yellow cheddar) 4 tbsp olive oil 4 tbsp whole wheat flour (i use pastry, white is fine too) garlic some milk (about 1 1/2-2 cups) fresh ground pepper garlic salt

crust--if you have them, you can use canned biscuits instead
1 cup flour (i use half wheat, half white)
5 tbsp butter (chilled and cubed)
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 c boiling water

preheat oven to 425 degrees.


place thawed broccoli in 8x8 baking dish. saute mushrooms and scallions in olive oil. once they've softened, add garlic. add flour and stir until lumps disappear. add milk slowly, stopping when the sauce has thickened to your taste. (it'll take a minute for the sauce to thicken; take it slowly.) add cheeses and stir until melted. season to taste, and pour over broccoli.

meanwhile, mix flour, salt, garlic powder, and baking powder. cut chilled butter into flour mixture until mixture develops pretty uniform crumbs. pour in boiling water and stir just until everything in moist. scoop dough over broccoli slop.

bake in oven for about 30 minutes or until dough browns. (i find that i have to cover until the last ten minutes of cooking so that it doesn't get too brown. it's up to you.)

absolutely delicious. one of my favorites so far.

slightly caribbean rice (aka alton brown's recipe with some stuff added)

1 1/2 c short grain brown rice
1 14 oz can coconut milk ( i used light)
3/4 c broth
1 bay leaf red pepper flakes to taste
curry powder (i didn't measure, use your discretion)
you can use salt but, i'm trying this bragg stuff out (liquid amino acids)

preheat oven to 350 degrees. pour rice into baking dish. bring broth and coconut milk to simmer. add bay leaf, red pepper, and curry powder. pour milk mixture over rice, stir, cover with foil, and bake in oven until all liquid is absorbed (about 40 minutes).
















a few notes:
aldi's steamed veggies in a tray are phenomenal. low in sodium, easy to prepare, cheap, and tasty as sin. go thee to the nearest aldi and stock up. (get the spring blend.)

my old people's cake from yesterday was a big hit. i'll be making it again, as i really enjoyed it myself.

MUSHROOM RISOTTO - DAY TWO

This isn't so hard. Meat can be easily avoided. I've had an epiphany, though. So far, I'm more of a starchatarian than a vegetarian. Most of my meals are rice- or pasta-based. Working veggies in is really gonna be a problem.

Anyway, tonight I made my first risotto. I used a super short grain Spanish rice, and what a mistake. If you ever make a risotto, please use arborio or carnaroli. Your palette will thank you. It still turned out tasty; it just didn't have that signature creaminess.

Recipe (For one large portion or two small ones)
about 2 oz. fresh mushrooms, sliced
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1/2 c risotto rice
1 scallion, diced
1/2 clove garlic, diced
3 tbsp white wine
2-3 c stock (i used chicken. it was homemade. i rule.)
butter, unsalted
salt and pepper to taste
Parmesan, fresh


bring stock up to simmer and keep it there. cook mushrooms in one tbsp olive oil until soft and remove from heat. sweat scallion in remaining olive oil until transparent and add garlic and rice. when rice is thoroughly coated in oil and slightly transparent (about two minutes), add wine and stir until absorbed. now, add chicken stock in small portions (about 1/4 cup), only adding more after previous portion is absorbed. keep stirring. in about 20 minutes or so, you should have a creamy, al dente rice dish. stir in mushrooms, remove from heat, stir in a bit of butter, and season with salt and pepper. garnish with freshly grated parmesan and voilà.

as i said, it was tasty, but next time i'll use Italian short grain. oh, and i must also commend myself on making my own chicken stock. it was mad easy and kills any other stock i've ever had. i just threw a whole chicken in a pot with a halved onion, celery stalks, fresh rosemay, bay leaf, tyme, and sage, covered them in cold water, and boiled for about three hours. after being strained, it was ready to go. people may tell you to get rid of the fat, but i have some very lofty plans for it once this vegetarianism is over.

in other news, tomorrow's my daddy's birthday. i'll be kicking it with the fam tomorrow, and was given the task of making the birthday cake. since my dad is kinda weird in his tastes and probably wouldn't have liked my signature chocolate fudge cake, i made him an applesauce spice cake with cream cheese frosting and walnuts. hopefully, it will get eaten. after all, this is totally an old people's cake.

until tomorrow

Vegetarianism - Day One (Kinda)

Quick explanation -- I eat way too much red meat and pork. Once upon a time, I had stopped, but when I moved back in with my mommy after college, she refused to remember my no red meat/pork rules; plus her boyfriend made THE most delicious rib tips ever, so I failed. Well here it is, years later, and I pop bacon cheeseburgers like tic tacs. The other day, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than I ever have in my life; additionally, I can comfortably fit into less than 20% of my clothes, so I figured a quick detour into vegetarianism would help. Two weeks of tasty (?) recipes, plenty of water, and back breaking Pilates, join me on my quest to ... FIT BACK INTO MY GEAR!!!!! What's in it for you? Well, recipes, of course, and the potential to share in my triumph or watch me fail miserably.


DAY ONE -
Okay, so I had tuna for lunch, but I made it on Sunday as a farewell-to-flesh meal and was too full to eat it, so I polished it off today. However, breakfast and dinner were both vegetarian as hell.

I had the most fabulous pasta at Enoteca Roma once, pear ravioli with walnut cream sauce and Gorgonzola cheese. Since then, I've been trying to replicate that taste at home. Tonight, I tried whole wheat spaghetti with walnut cream sauce and pears. (I find spaghetti and like pastas are pretty much the only palatable whole wheat varieties; the other ones are too big and interfere with the sauces.) Anyway, my experiment paid off. It was definitely good, but certainly not low-fat, just low-meat.

Recipe
cooked whole wheat spaghetti (enough for two portions)
handful of walnuts (toasted and chopped)
3 tbsp unsalted butter
2 tbsp flour (I used whole wheat pastry flour)
1-2 cups milk or half and half ( I used both and didn't measure, just add until the consistency of the sauce suits your taste)
white wine
1 bosc pear (cored and cubed, you can use any sweet variety)
Nutmeg (again, I didn't measure, maybe 1/2 tsp)
garlic salt
Directions
This is pretty easy. Toast the walnuts either in a pan or in the oven and chop. I use a mini food chopper. Set aside.

Saute the pears over medium heat in one tablespoon of butter until they're slightly brown and add as much white wine as you like to taste. Let the alcohol cook off some and set the pears aside.

Make a Béchamel sauce by slowly melting the remaining butter and adding the flour to form a smooth paste. Make sure the lumps are gone. Add milk and stir until you reach your desired consistency and add your seasonings. Once the sauce is seasoned well, stir in the walnuts, pears and spaghetti.

Bon Appétit

(From now on, I'll try to take pictures of my meals before I gobble them down.)

IT'S BACK! VIENNETTA IS BACK!!!!

I have no words.

Okay, maybe a few.

This dessert is so much more than crispy wafers, delicious "ice cream," and a dusting of chocolate powder. It's the foundation of friendships, friendships built on gluttony and the itis and co-dependent emotional eating. Monica remembers the times we'd split these down the center and eat contently for minutes. I thought they'd gone forever, but alas, my drinking habit (the one that had me trolling for beer at two in the afternoon) had me serendipitously happen upon these wonderful slices of heaven at the Jewel-Osco on Roosevelt & Ashland. (In a not so funny twist on this tale, I was followed from the store by security for stealing. Huh?)

Anyway, I haven't opened them yet, so they may be disgusting, much like the "Jello Pudding Pops" Monica and I found some years ago. (Boy was that a disaster. So sad, so sad.) However, I believe in the resiliance of ice milk and chocolate wafers. I mean, who could screw that up?

I'll report back.

A Couple of Things

True Blood is really fricking addictive, and I can't stop watching. Each week, I shake my head at Sookie Stackhouse's big-assed mouth and the shittiness of her brother's judgment, but do I stop tuning in? Nope. And this week has tethered me even tighter to this porn-cum-vampire drama. And real talk (pause) that girlfriend chick is a psycho. Jason, heed the word of the brother (in this case, Milton from Office Space); she ain't shit. Also ...


SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!!











I just knew Sam was a shapeshifter. I also think he's a lycan (if that's possible), but that remains to be seen.



Second, Shoot 'Em Up, despite its mediocre reviews, was fucking fantastic. Non-stop action, ridiculously dope kills (he shots the shit out of about four dudes while "entertaining" Monica Bellucci) equal some shit I'd watch again. Thumbs way up!

Also, I don't mess with football.at.all. That shit is maaaaaaaaaaad boring. However, I'd like to send a shout out to Bob Sanders. Homeboy is fine ass frog hair, caucasian strands, and Italian cashmere.

Hello, mummy!




















Lastly, for years I thought that Jewels (s, an essential addition to any store name) had abandoned making the frosted nut brownies that I had come to love over the years. I said eff it and learned to make my own. Come to find out (mmm hmm, I was gonna buy a birthday cake cuz I was feeling down. Fat girl emotions, fat girl solutions, my peeps) they had just been relocated to the freezer section. Good to know for future high-stress situations.


Umm .. please excuse my wanky font. PEMWF.

I REALLY Love Food, Bacon Especially

Perhaps the most appropriate post considering the name of my blog. I like food. I like eating it, watching shows about it, talking about it, and, sometimes, fixing it. I'm not too expressive, but the right meal can bring tears to my eyes. (See my post about the salted caramel cupcakes from More.) You see that blurry shot over there? That's a dancing bacon man ... on my arm. I don't regret it and I doubt I ever will. As a matter of fact, a cannibalistic cheeseburger and stick of butter on a throne will be joining him soon.

I figured I'd give bacon the place it deserves on my blog, center stage. See, it appears I am so not alone. The people love bacon. Apparently, there's this bacon frenzy all over the innanets. Who knew? Why not count the ways?

Bacon Extravaganza!!!!

There's a seasoning available to make anything taste like bacon. Now, how convenient is that? Honestly, is there anything that shouldn't?

The same company gives you the opportunity to smear it on your favorite sandwich in naise form. Really, these people are saints. And no worries for those who give not one muck, there is a full fat version.

Lazy? Too busy to bother with bacon yourself? No problem. There are robots who will shop and come to your house to fix it for you. Hilarious, but I'm not making this up. Go here and type in your zip code for an appointment.

Eating aside, I'm sure some of you have felt the need to be swaddled in bacon, to smell like it even. Here, my dears, is the answer to your dreams, a bacon-scented, bacon print tuxedo. A darn good price, only 100 bucks at Archie McPhee's.

Or maybe you'd rather luxuriate in pig in the privacy of your home. This too is possible. Chrischunski over at Etsy would love to accommodate you with this bacon-patterned scarf knit from merino wool.

Maybe you just wanna stay in the know. No problem. Bacon Today is an online magazine dedicated to daily musings about this magical meat. Stop by.

Cupcake Crazy

I've been on a rampage lately, a rampage to ingest as much sugary crap as is humanly possible. Apparently, Chicago is the perfect city for this, as we have quite a selection of bakeries. Follow me, fellow fat ass, as I take an inventory of Chicago's cupcakeries.



Sweet Mandy B's
1208 W Webster Ave
Mon-Thu 8:00 a.m.-9:00 p.m.
Fri-Sat 8:00 a.m.-10:00 p.m.
Sun 8:00 a.m.-9:00 p.m.

It's relatively close to the house and has quite a selection. Downside, there is routinely a gaggle of moms with expensive strollers and shitloads of children--so annoying. I've tried quite a number of things here: cupcakes, cake slices, cookies, pie, and puddings. At first, this place was the cat's meow; I thought the dreamsicle cupcake was the bestest thing in life. Now, I know better. Better is ...




Molly's Cupcakes
2536 North Clark Street
MONDAY » 12:00pm to 10:00pm
TUESDAY – THURSDAY » 8:00am to 10:00pm
FRIDAY – SATURDAY » 8:00am to 12:00am
SUNDAY » 8:00am to 10:00pm
I've been going to Aloha Grill directly next door for a while now, but never noticed that a cupcake spot that serves HOME MADE ICE CREAM happened to open next door. How is this possible? Did my fat girl radar break? Anyway, while on an excursion to find new frames for my homey Rachel, we spotted Molly's and promptly decided to go in. Not too many days later, Monica, Chanda, and I returned. (They subsequently returned the next day; I love that my friends are as fat as I.) Not only do they serve one of the best red velvet cupcakes in the city (the frosting just bursts with cream cheese flavor), but they have stuffed and filled cupcakes as well. The Ron Bennington is chocolate cake with a peanut-butter-butterscotch filling, chocolate ganache, and a crushed butterscotch topping. Come on, go here people. It's a super cute place and the desserts are outstanding.





More Cupcakes
One East Delaware Place
8 a.m. to 7 p.m. Monday through Saturday
and 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. on Sunday
Just hit this spot today and was inspired by, perhaps, the best cupcake I've ever had to author this entry. More is simply cupcakes, nothing else. This place is quite a hot topic since they've been featured in Time Out Chicago and other food media. Bottom line, the hype is deserved. Both Monica and I bought a flight featuring six mini cupcakes and were thoroughly pleased by everything. The salted caramel cupcake will change your life. Imagine moist yellow cake filled with rich, salted caramel and topped with fluffy icing and a dusting of what I assume is sea salt. For those of you with sweet tooths (yes, i mean tooths), the addition of salt may seem somewhat blasphemous. Trust me, as a person who puts brown sugar in everything (including lasagna), it is a perfect counterpoint to the cupcake's sweetness. They're a bit expensive, but if you have the money, it's worth it.

Yum

This is the greatest thing I've ever tasted. Seriously, I teared up when I tried it. I simply thought this was because of the delicious flavor, but once I had my friend Rachel taste, I realized the reason was a bit fatter and more disturbing; this is essentially butter in ice cream form. So, if you love butter, could eat sticks of it (like I sometimes do), get thee to your local Haagen Daz supplier.

Honorable Mentions

Caramelized Pear and Toasted Pecan

Green Tea