"Spring" is Here

(Note: There may be an obvious absence of r's in this post because MC Fatty Fat Ass spilled delicious treats on the keyboard and now the r and z are stuck, sorry.)

The arbitrary calendar says that spring is here, and though those of us in Chicago know better, understand that spring is some illusory season that never really comes, there's no reason to not welcome the spring fashions.

As I've done for many springs now, I have decided on a theme upon which my entire wardrobe will be based. This year, my theme will be (wait for it) ... Bright Assed Global Animal Farm. Yes, it sounds awful, like some loud ass hodge podge of fur and skin; however, do not be mislead by this simple description of what may be my best summer yet; I will be fabulous. In honor of my chosen summer theme, I present some pieces that must be copped. Please do resist the urge to bite, for biting is neither grown nor sexy.



It is not enough to simply hint at the animal influence. No, there must be actual animals hanging from one's ears. We all know I'll one day be that older woman draped in zebra print. Better to embrace it now.



Snakes on a chain. *snicker*



Nothing like a big ole piece of fake turquoise to liven things up.



♪"Monkeys [no] and tigers [yes], loop the loop."♪
Crouching tiger, hidden dragon.



Stacks and stacks of Ma(a)sai bracelets are good for the soul.




Love this shoe. It looks a bit overwhelming here, but I've seen it in person and trust me, it is divine. The leather is as soft as those nice guys who finish last, and the shoe is so well constructed, I could probably wear it exclusively all summer.



I anticipate this shoe will fill all my "neutralize this look" needs.




Another from my current favorite shoe designer.



This post would not be complete without a wedge. We all know that I love a wedge. This one, in electric blue and suede, is enough to fulfill both my shoes wants--comfort and ridiculousness.



Cute and comfy mini-wedges from Due Farina's diffusion line. Just bright enough to pair with even brighter colors.



As you can see, I haven't exactly made it to actual clothing yet, but I'm getting there. And really, once you've got you accessories and shoes picked out, everything else is a piece of cake.