Top Five Halloween Viewing

My favorite holiday of the year is a-coming, which provides a perfect excuse to make yet another list of horror movies that I enjoy. In addition to the old stand-bys, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and Halloween, there are hundreds of other films fit to make you laugh, cry or puke. Why not let them entertain you?

Top Five Horror Films (in no particular order)

TO MAKE YOU LAUGH

1. Army of Darkness

2. Night of the Creeps

3. Black Sheep

4. Tales of Terror

5. Werewolf

TO GENUINELY CREEP YOU OUT

1. The Exorcist

2. The Thing

3. The Birds

4. The Ring

5. Nosferatu (1922)

TO MAKE YOU SAY, "WHAT THE FUCK?"

1. Videodrome

2. The Beyond

3. Phantasm

4. Sisters

5. Tenebrae

Twisted Nostalgia - Horror for Kiddies

I have a new favorite podcast, horroretc (horror etcetera). If you love horror, are deeply nostalgic, and like knowledgeable but fun discussion of your favorite flicks, check them out. They don't ramble like most podcasters.

In the process of catching up on their 150 shows, I came across Episode 80, Kid Friendly Horror, and thought back to my younger days, those spent watching Svengoolie and renting videos from the local shop (or having my mom rent them ... whatever). Though I started out pretty early watching things I shouldn't have (Vampyros Lesbos anyone?), I have so many memories of those kid-geared early flicks that were the right mix of creepy and comforting.

Something Wicked This Way Comes - Honestly I can't remember a thing from this movie other than some magical light and advanced aging and a guy with a great beard, but I remember loving it. I think a teacher of mine actually showed it in class.

The Witches - I wonder do kids have people like Roald Dahl today, a man that writes funny but disturbing tales that refuse to mistake the audience's youth for stupidity. The Witches brought Dahl's special blend of crazy, funny, and creepy to the screen pretty well (despite the happy ending). With Angelica Houston, you really can't go wrong. I swear, everytime this movie magically finds its way onscreen, I forget how shitty it is to be an adult and get all warm and happy inside. Jim Henson was involved!

The Monster Squad - I think I've mentioned my love for Night of the Creeps numerous times. Fred Dekker was responsible for that masterpiece and this one, an homage to childhood and the classic pantheon of monsters. Another I have to rewatch since I haven't seen it in a while but undoubtedly one of the best from that period.

The Gate - Remember The Gate! Man, that was my stuff (not to be confused with The Stuff). All I remember is a gate (of course) and some kids and a portal to hell, but boy was that combination fantastic. I now know that it stars a young Stephen Dorff. Who knew?

The Lady in White - Man!!!! This movie used to come on what felt like all the time. So atmospheric, this film. A true ghost story that creates a mood that is sustained the entire time. If you've never seen it, do.

Transylvania 6-5000 - Does anyone remember this? It was fantastic. Jeff Goldblum stars as a dude who travels to Transylvannia for a story, but that's not really important. What's important is that this movie is completely silly and hilarious. They just don't make them like this anymore.

Haunted Honeymoon - Gene Wilder and Gilda Ratner star as a couple who honeymoon in a haunted castle (I think). Another horror/comedy that just cracked me up as a yute. I miss that Gilda Ratner.

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown - Okay so this isn't quite a horror flick, but it is Halloween-themed, so it counts. I love the Peanuts features; they always make me so happy and sad at the same time. This one's an annual favorite.

What I've Been Watching

My Doctor

Dr. Who (reboot): Seasons 1 &2 - Revisting the first season with Christopher Eccleston, I've loved the initial episodes all over again, but I've also finally let go of my first doctor. He won't be back, so I've made my peace with David Tennant. Matt Smith is still on the outs though.

Being Human - I just love British television. It's grainy (which reignites my 70s and 80s nostalgia), tends to feature more black people than US offerings, and gets directly to the point with six-episode or so seasons (generally). This show, about a ghost, werewolf, and vampire attempting to cling to their humanity, is well done and not at all corny like you'd expect. Actually, it's kinda dark.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World - Saw this one with the family on Friday. Really entertaining. Definitely in my top five of the summer. (Not hard considering this summer's offerings were pretty universally crap.)

The Expendables - Another family outing. This was required viewing for one who grew up on action (my mom is an action hound). Loved the 80s/early 90s explosion-laden, plot-lacking, big-dude-with-muscles action. Dolph Lundgren looks great.

Black Sunday & Bay of Blood AKA Twitch of the Death Nerve - I love my Italian horror, but sadly, had not explored the work of Mario Bava. Black Sunday was pretty standard to me, reminded me a lot of those old Corman movies with Vincent Price. Bay of Blood, on the other hand, was great. That beautiful coloring and cinematography with the signature Italian gore and atmosphere. This one also had a plot, which I am NOT used to. Seems like Bava, unlike my beloved Fulci, likes to pay attention to the story, too. Interesting that.

Venture Bros., Season 4.1 - Just amping myself for its return on September 12. It's my absolute favorite show on television, and I can't wait.

The Seven Doors of Death AKA The Beyond - People consider this Fulci's masterpiece, a successful union of his fondness for gore-heavy images and oneiric vision. I think a good many of his films succeed in this union, but I must say this one has one of the biggest WTF endings ever. Face-eating tarantulas, unexplained blindness, hydrochloric acid accidents, quicklime crucifixion punishments, time-space shifts, this film really does have it all. I watch it at least once a year.

(Do be aware that the former title usually refers to the edited US release except when released by Diamond Entertainment.)

Breaking Bad - Monica finally broke me. I succumbed to her constant rhapsodizing about how great this show is. I've only made it to season two, but she's right, it's pretty good. I'm still mildly freaked out about how much I'm gonna be destroyed when horrible things happen to my protagonist. It's bound to happen.

I Love Bad Movies

A revelation after succumbing to Showtime's repeated airings of Twilight (which motivated my subsequent scrambling for the book, but that's something else).

I like compact, formulaic movies that get to the point, are overly earnest or are too on-the-nose. They get that entertainment is sometimes about fulfilling strict expectations in ways that are completely unsubtle.

Some really great bad movies

Death Race (actually, anything with Jason Statham. Many of his movies aren't bad.)

The House Bunny (Anna Faris is hi-larious.)

Halloween III: Season of the Witch (No Michael Myers. No problem.)

Shoot 'Em Up (Was this considered bad? I loved it.)

Double Dragon (It's so colorful, and Mark Dacascos is amazing.)

Teen Witch (Fantastic musical numbers. RIP Zelda Rubenstein.)

Killer Klowns From Outer Space (I think everyone knows I love this movie.)

Alligator People (50's fun)

Black Sheep (Just saw this one recently. It's a horror-comedy in the vein of Dead Alive and Bad Taste about killer sheep in New Zealand. It's like a werewolf movie but with sheep. It's fantastic.)

Nothing But Trouble (C'mon! It has Chevy Chase, John Candy, and Digital Underground!)

House by the Cemetery (Lucio Fulci has to make an appearance. His movies aren't for everybody. You have to appreciate movies with no plot, loose ends, and phantasmagoric gore to enjoy this.)

Femme Fatale (I'm a Brian DePalma fangirl, so yeah, loved it.)

Atrack's Movies of the Year (So Far)

Don't go thinking this is some scholarly statement on the cinema. I like popcorn movies for the most part, things that are quickly-paced or fun to watch or just not depressing. I don't see sad movies or Oscar fodder. The last time I accidentally saw one of those meditations on the human experience, I was depressed for a week and had horrible nightmares. No, no way to those. Plus, I don't think it's fair that best of lists are usually dominated by the serious films. Poo poo to that.

In no particular order

1.Drag Me To Hell - Sam Raimi took a break from the super blockbuster and returned to his splatter, horror-comedy roots. Totally worked for me.

2. Coraline - The type of children's story I love--dark, intelligent, and rich. Reminds me of my Roald Dahl-reading days as a youth. The 3-D experience made this one even better. Gorgeous movie. Please see it.

3. The Hangover - Not perfect, but pretty consistently funny if you like dumb-ass humor and slightly offensive shtick. That Galifianakis is a hilarious dude.

4. Taken - Just straight ass kicking. Liam Neeson karate chopped the shit out of people's throats and made good on all sorts of threats. That little daughter could've been a little more grateful.

5. Zombieland - I like zombies and Woody Harrelson. *shrug*


Honorable Mention: I really liked GI Joe, Star Trek, and District 9 too.

Also, I've kinda dropped the ball. I haven't seen Ninja Assassin, 9, The Fantastic Mr. Fox, Where the Wild Things Are, or Moon yet. I'm pretty sure my list will completely change once I catch up.

Back in the Saddle Again

A quick update on my summer movie viewing and return to sewing

See It
Drag Me to Hell
Star Trek
Tyson

Eh
X-Men Origins: Wolverine
Terminator Salvation

Don't Bother
Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

Next Up
The Limits of Control (Isaach De Bankole is back!)
Up
The Hangover
Public Enemies
Land of the Lost
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Also, The Deadliest Warrior provides some serious entertainment. This show pits historical bad-assess against each other and simulates battles in order to determine who'd be victorious. The season's over, but that means you have plenty of time to catch up. Sure, the simulations will probably upset you at times (I'm still mad that the ninja fell to the Spartan and the Yakuza to the Mafia), but the concept alone is worthy of a few viewings.

Finally, I've been sewing again. Check out Knit Deez for updates.

Hitchcock

You know, I'm surprised there hasn't been any serious porn exploiting this guy's name. I mean ... Hitchcock. Yeah.

Anyway, one of my favorite directors, blah, blah, blah. Love his movies, doody doo. Since I'm on this hiatus from life, I figured I'd watch all the Hitchcock I haven't seen. (See? That sentence makes me feel dirty. *shudder*)

Seen
Spellbound - Many a day in undergrad spent watching this one. Gregory Peck was a looker. Good movie, but the inferior version of Marnie in my opinion.
Marnie - Severely underrated. Perhaps my favorite. No one plays beautiful and dangerous ice queen like Tippi Hedren. Sean Connery did some horrid, horrid things in this, but my was he smmoth with it.
The Birds - Creepy and fantastic. In the top five.
Vertigo - Jimmy Stewart's my favorite Hitchcock leading man.
Psycho - Honestly, who hasn't seen this? Way to milk the franchise, greedy hollywood.
Frenzy - Surprisingly violent and disturbing, which means I loved it.
Rope - Another underrated piece featuring the man, Jimmy Stewart.
Shadow of a Doubt - Good stuff, man. Uncle Charlie was just plain bogus.
The Trouble with Harry - Hilarious. Who knew a corpse (that's not reanimated) could be so much fun?
Rear Window - Part of the cultural fabric. How many parodies of this one have you seen?

Kinda Seen, meaning was on TV as I did other stuff and intermittently paid attention.
North by Northwest - I do like Cary Grant. So smooth, that one.
Torn Curtain - Starring the most attractive white man the white world has ever offered, Paul Newman.

Seeing Soon - I came up at the Walmart a few months back. Twenty Hitchcock movies--mostly the older ones, including the first version of "The Man Who Knew Too Much," four discs in total--for only five bucks. This is what I got, a frickin' steal.
Dial M For Murder - Watching it tonight.
The Lady Vanishes
The 39 Steps
Strangers on a Train

Watching The Watchmen

first off, the book and the movie are two different vehicles. read it. say it aloud. accept it as truth. also, this is not a proper review, more so me trying to work out my feelings about the movie. no spoilers, so feel free to read it.


my feelings about this movie are complicated because i can't be sure if i liked it or not. the director, zack snyder, was obviously intent on remaining true to the source material, and it shows. most of the visuals and dialogue were snatched directly from the pages of the novel, with few, very few, exceptions. as i watched, i knew what each scene would look like, sound like, as panels from the novel appeared in exact succession with characters saying nearly exactly what they say on page. after a while, i was left feeling no anticipation, just expectation. i can't say that this is the director's fault. i was the one, after all, who decided to read the darned thing, but i think there's a useful discussion in here somewhere about the merits of risk taking in film adaptation. despite snyder's near perfect reverence for the text, i almost found his need to simply provide a slide show of the text somewhat dull, without risk and boring.

it wasn't all bad, though. often i found myself remarking aloud about the beauty of the film. it was gorgeous in many places, and sometimes, the faithfulness of the adaptation was exactly what was called for. mr. manhattan's famous exile, for example, was beautiful. i found myself nearly as arrested by the film's rendering of it as i was by its textual counterpart. entertaining, too, were the fights. the violence was particularly graphic, so much so that my mom, brother, and i often found ourselves gritting our teeth. it was strange in a way, the stillness of the film juxtaposed with the brutality of its fight scenes. i figured snyder was attempting to satiate watchers who would be bothered by the lethargic pace of the film.

another problem was a few of the casting choices. i flat out disliked the actress playing laurie/silk spectre II; she was annoying and wasn't talented enough to give the character any depth. laurie was my least favorite in the novel, too, but a good actress should bring something to the table. what REALLY annoyed me was the choice for ozymandias. this guy and his character are so integral to the plot that his less-than-stellar acting was seriously lowered the quality of the film. though he is regarded from a distance as golden, in addition to his intellect and physical prowess, adrian veldt is likeable and radiates a personality that draws people in. i did not get this from matthew goode at all. in fact, i found him pompous, stiff, and unsympathetic. jude law probably would've been the better choice.

jackie earle haley as rorschach was perfect. seriously, every time he appeared on screen, things picked up again and you finally found yourself feeling any sort of kinship or sympathy for a character. jeffrey dean morgan (bizarro robert downey jr.) was also good as the comedian.

fans won't be satisfied if they're looking for the same amount of depth in character development, allegory, and themes. there just isn't enough time, but i do think that the idea of self-chosen superheroes, regular people who have chosen this burden for one reason or another, is interestingly handled and results in a movie that is beautiful and provocative. a better movie, one that is all those things AND entertaining would've needed more editing, a better pace, and a much better cast; however, i'm glad i saw it.

Wuthering Heights - The Hate Sure Is Strong

So ... last night marked the end of the latest adaptation of Wuthering Heights, another ITV version. Though no one has yet been able to find a non-white dude to play Heathcliff, and the pace was a bit too brisk, I enjoyed it. As with anything else I enjoy, I found myself yelling at the screen, especially at Edgar and Isabella's dumb asses. So yeah, it was good; I'll watch it again.

Now I love the hell out of this book, which is why I keep hoping for the definitive adaptation, but it chaps my hide when people think of it as romantic. This is not a romantic story; it's a great Gothic tale, full of horrible, terrible, stupid people, with a bit of redemption at the end. I'm more amazed by than attracted to Heathcliff's character, as I am by all insanely passionate people. He was able to sustain dangerous amounts of hate for decades (DECADES!) and killed people with it. He's like a super, extra archvillain--Haterman or something. I supposed chicks think his unyielding love for Cathy is especially sentimental, but they kinda forget that he vowed to make her suffer for it. And Cathy (the elder), she had no problem fraternizing with another man while married and actively pursues vengeance on her husband for decisions she, herself, made. Edgar and Isabella are spineless dolts (good people, but dumb as rocks regardless). The whole thing is a mess, a wonderful, terrifying mess. The lesson is, kiddies, hate destroys. If you find yourself wanting to damn people to hell, go see a movie, have a delicious burger, or seek therapy. It just isn't worth it.

Random Comments
-Tom Hardy did a pretty good job. I bought his vengeance, and I see why chicks dig him.
- That scene with Heathcliff cradling Cathy's skeleton? Beautiful, just wonderfully sick and fantastic!
-Charlotte Riley looked fantastic as Cathy and was much less annoying than Juliette Binoche.
-Cathy (the elder) needed to be much more of an asshole. She came off as a somewhat decent person, which she wasn't.
-Love Actually (the one who was in love with Kiera Knightly)was in it; he played Edgar Linton.
-I seriously dislike the Ralph Fiennes/Juliette Binoche version.

A fantastic deconstruction of our protagonists' psyches.


And now another satisfyingly creepy interpretation of Wuthering Heights. Go Kate Bush!

Download It


Oh yeah, I updated Knit Deez ... finally.

Happy New Year

Note the lack of appropriate exclamation. It's a new year, sure, but these arbitrary distinctions in time don't really excite me, especially since nothing has really changed for me.

Ha! Ha! (Mood change.)

No need to be all Eeyore in this piece.

So, just to kick things off all proper like, I figure I'd address those who apparently read this blog but do not comment. Thanks for reading ... really. It's good to know that Monica isn't the only one.


Next, a quick movie review. The fam and I saw The Spirit, which was godawful. I got the comedic turn on film noir; however, it was so poorly done that there were very few redemptive qualities. I mean, the characters were so flat as to appear wooden. The dialogue was stiffer than Ron Jeremy at an outdoor orgy. Oh yeah, the cinematography was pretty great to my untutored eyes, and Scarlett Johansson's wardrobe was pretty boss, but that's it. Other than that, wait for it to come OnDemand, if then. Sorry, Gabriel Macht, no star turn for you.

Finally, the jury is in. I'm 30, which means I need to stop being delusional about my core self. I hate parties. I do not enjoy the company of large throngs of strangers (unless, of course, we've come together for the mutual appreciation of some music act). My idea of "going out" is eating. That's it. Take my rapacious ass to a restaurant of some sort, place me in front of a platter of edibles, and get back. That, my dears, is what life is about, chasing diabetes and blood pressure. In honor of this recognition, I spent half of New Year's Eve enjoying the comforts of slightly hoity-toity foods with my like-minded buddies. For only 40 bucks, we feasted on chicken livers mousse, trout roe blinis, Sicilian tuna, seafood bouillabaisse, young chicken with chestnuts, chocolate date cakes, and honey panna cottas. It was all delicious. If in Chicago, check out The Bristol on 2152 N. Damen; I hear they have brunch, which I'm thoroughly looking forward to. I then went to a party, where I quickly retreated into an empty room to play cards then went out for more food. Ain't nothing like a BLT at three in the morning.




Blinis and chicken liver mousse

Sicilian Tuna

Chocolate Date Pudding Cake and Chestnut Honey Panna Cotta

You're The Gay

Makes little sense, but follow me. Let's pretend that you have two pretty successful movies under your belt, what appears to be a decent budget, and Jason Statham's ridiculously amazing body. Imagine, now, that you're making an action flick.

Please, for the love of the many gods, why would you write a screenplay where the "action" is of the 80's teen flick variety--steamy make outs in a car and some uninspired car chases? You're telling me that a frickin' fantastic premise (an explosive bracelet that detonates when one strays too far from a car) and an international back drop yields a mediocre action flick? No, this is unacceptable.

This photo doesn't even come close to showing
how cut Statham was in the movie.
If only for the love of lechery, go see The Transporter 3.

Let me return to how insanely serious Jason Statham's retardedly delectable body was. Dude put in some serious work training for this film, and there was hardly a reason for him to display his handiwork. All these things working in your favor and the only memorable portion of the movie is the sidekick chick's accusation that "[Statham's] the gay"? I simply don't get it.

Nevertheless, I was never not entertained. I kept watching and wasn't bored. I'm just disappointed that a wonderful franchise of The Transporter's ilk ends (?) on such a non committal note.

C-

A Couple of Things

True Blood is really fricking addictive, and I can't stop watching. Each week, I shake my head at Sookie Stackhouse's big-assed mouth and the shittiness of her brother's judgment, but do I stop tuning in? Nope. And this week has tethered me even tighter to this porn-cum-vampire drama. And real talk (pause) that girlfriend chick is a psycho. Jason, heed the word of the brother (in this case, Milton from Office Space); she ain't shit. Also ...


SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!! SPOILERS!!!











I just knew Sam was a shapeshifter. I also think he's a lycan (if that's possible), but that remains to be seen.



Second, Shoot 'Em Up, despite its mediocre reviews, was fucking fantastic. Non-stop action, ridiculously dope kills (he shots the shit out of about four dudes while "entertaining" Monica Bellucci) equal some shit I'd watch again. Thumbs way up!

Also, I don't mess with football.at.all. That shit is maaaaaaaaaaad boring. However, I'd like to send a shout out to Bob Sanders. Homeboy is fine ass frog hair, caucasian strands, and Italian cashmere.

Hello, mummy!




















Lastly, for years I thought that Jewels (s, an essential addition to any store name) had abandoned making the frosted nut brownies that I had come to love over the years. I said eff it and learned to make my own. Come to find out (mmm hmm, I was gonna buy a birthday cake cuz I was feeling down. Fat girl emotions, fat girl solutions, my peeps) they had just been relocated to the freezer section. Good to know for future high-stress situations.


Umm .. please excuse my wanky font. PEMWF.

Happy Birthday, Jason Statham

I must admit, for a small*, balding white man, I like you much more than I should. But, how could I help myself? You kick ass.

Happy birthday to you, that ridiculous body of yours, and your body of work. I just saw Death Race a few weeks ago, and it was everything it should've been. Keep on truckin' my dude and I'll be there the day Transporter 3 opens.

*My bad. Turns out, he's 5'10".


Transporter 3 Trailer

Nostalgia

maybe i'm remembering wrong, for i am quite known for my completely useless "memory" (yes, it's so bad, there's something slightly ironic about naming it such), but one of my few memories of early life involves sitting cross-legged on my mother's bed watching gruesome horror movies in the dark. that's it. no games with friends or special christmases or ballet recitals but cinematic homicide.

(my mommy had a penchant for action films so i watched a lot of those too.)

i wonder now how much my early cinematic tastes affected who i've become. up until the age of 25 or so, i only had bloody dreams. babies fell from the sky and splattered on the sidewalk, vampires morphed out of blocks of turkey ham, skyscraper-sized gorillas traversed the city smashing people with their enormous ape feet (yep, these are all real). it wasn't until my late twenties that i had real dreams with people and not ghouls or monsters in them. maybe i was just born weird or maybe watching the pivotal final scene in Sleepaway Camp pushed me over the edge. who knows? all i know is that today, i am a near 30-year-old who still collects crappy anchor bay horror movies and is *this* close to crying if the evil dead remake becomes a reality (read: this would be bad, so very bad).

The Best of My Cinematic Adolescence

Evil Dead - perhaps my favorite movie of all time. the last twenty minutes is a carnival of putrescence. thank you, ash.

Night of the Creeps - hard to find yet so worth it when you do. what do you get when you mix c-level actors, slugs from outer space, and a college campus? this wonderful exercise in brilliance.

Scanners - david cronenberg is a creepy, creepy man. that said, he makes a mean movie. one of the more serious films on my list.

Monster Squad - not really horror, moreso horror influenced. it's like The Goonies with classic movie monsters. i just learned this, but the guy who's responsible for Night of the Creeps (Fred Dekker) also worked on this. he's a genius.

Silent Night, Deadly Night - at the time, i had no idea mothers were so pissed. i guess they were pissed about the killer santa. whatevs, this movie is great.

Prom Night - one of Jamie Lee Curtis's finest films.

Black Christmas - another tale of christmas crazies. considering how stressful this time of year is, i'm surprised there aren't more christmas serial killers. this was recently remade, and i refused to acknowledge it.



Phantasm - it's old and, i feel, kinda overlooked. too bad cuz angus scrimm as the tall man is just scary for no reason.

Hellraiser - another one of the scariest on this list. while many of my picks have comedic undertones, this one is straight horror through and through. to this day, i dread opening my eyes when lights are flickering. i just know the cenobites will be standing there.

The Thing - one reason why Kurt Russell and John Carpenter are the men (not because they're white). horrifying and classic.

Fright Night - can't say how many times i've seen this one, but it still holds up for me. Chris Sarandon was born to be a vampire.




976-EVIL - apparently this was directed by Robert Englund. good job, Rob.

Creepshow/Creepshow 2 - you gotta love horror anthologies. some of the finest minds in horror come together for the greater good, which is what happened here. plant dude, played by Stephen King, actually makes me sad. "Thanks, lady, thanks for the ride."

The Hitcher - C. Thomas Howell should never have stopped. i recall being at my former best friend's aunt's in the suburbs (whew). one of the bestest deaths in horror history.

The Puppet Master - i'm not sure what to say about this one. it was, for sure, creepy. little demonic dolls traipsing around killing folks? it looks cheap as hell but works for some reason.

The Dark Knight

Heath Ledger played the hell out of The Joker.

this is how i had to open this review cuz really, he acted his ass off.

this, The Dark Knight, is the movie we (my brother and I) have been waiting for all summer. as far as we're concerned, the summer movie season is over. sure, we'll see some other assorted films, but this was it. did it justify such importance, such speculative awe? kinda.

i must say, both jimmy and i have the utmost respect for Christopher Nolan's talents. he is one of the few writer/directors whose need to control the stoichiometric balance of words and images isn't misguided (M. Night Shyamalan, stop it!). just recently, The Prestige ascended both our best of lists. see it if you haven't; it is fantastic. so yeah, we came to this film expecting magic, and perhaps that was a tad unfair.

what was good
if just considering the characters' developments, not the way in which they were paced, just development, we are talking about some of the best in comic movie history. the theme--the characteristics of a hero, what he or she represents, how he or she is to inspire, and why he or she is needed--was consistent and artfully woven throughout both the plot and the characters' actions. Batman/Bruce Wayne, Two-Face, Harvey Dent, and The Joker all complemented each other's internal conflicts with good and evil, and Nolan's skillful handling of the subject was evident; beyond offering flat characters who belonged at either end of the spectrum, he (and his brother?) wrote people who were constantly at odds with the strict moral codes they had created for themselves. this was particularly true for Batman and The Joker. the hero/villain dichotomy is often pretty deep in written form, but it's rare that it's translated to film. The Joker, the villain, who acts as the evil element, is complex. he is not simply bad, he's philosophically maniacal and truly the perfect foil to Batman's strictly-regulated hero.

Aaron Eckhart was a fantastic Harvey Dent. though my colleague intimated that Viggo Mortensen would've been much more welcome, I felt Eckhart did a good job being Gotham's golden boy and mixing in a touch of self-righteous arrogance. Morgan Freeman was Morgan Freeman--smooth, in control, carefully thoughtful as Lucius Fox. Gary Oldman continues to prove he's an actor with enviable talents. Maggie Gyllenhaal took over as Rachel and was good (better than wassername), but (I shall not finish this thought). Christian Bale continues to be a good Bruce Wayne and Batman, though he was more Batman than Bruce Wayne here. yes, all these folks did nice jobs, but this was Heath Ledger's movie. i was almost afraid that his last performance would be overrated, but goddamn, homie was akkin', yo! Jack Nicholson's Joker was a lunatic clown (and this was, in part, due to the nature of the Tim Burton's vision); Heath Ledger's was brilliantly psychotic and sarcastically funny but never a clown. his humor was in his ability to make his darkness complex, relatable, and really very scary. he held this movie together, no doubt about it. it would be nice for him to know how much people really dug his performance, and it's sad to know that he can never reprise this role, but so it goes.

now the problems. there were really only two. one: what was with that low-assed talking? you really had to struggle to hear what the hell they were saying. two: edit this shit, Christopher. this movie was at least two and half hours and felt like it. unlike Batman Begins, which was engaging straight through, this one allowed you to wonder when it was going to be over. by no means is it a bad film (and i've already acknowledged to myself that i could never call it one even if it is ... though it isn't), but the critics lied to me. Nolan did his film a serious disservice by including so much. a shorter, tighter film would've allowed this to be a masterpiece. i never really cared when Batman beat people up because i was given too much time between crises to be bored. i did, however, almost tear up at a few points.

ultimately, the brilliant parts outweigh the sluggish ones, and the last 15 minutes were beautiful. i have imax tickets to see it again next week and i'm not too mad about it.

Wanted was Gooooood/ Diane von Furstenberg/Dries van Noten

Do you like unnecessarily violent films? I do. Gun play so pretty it's almost poetic? Yep. Bad-ass characters who adhere to a code so strict, they have to be fictional? Mm hmm.

On my brother's birthday, we (my mom, my brother, 75% of the Baker Boys, and I) went to see Wanted, and so far, this is the only movie giving Iron Man a run for its money. It had it all. An opening sequence that elicits surprised expletives, fantastic special effects, the archetypal training sequence, a hilarious protagonist who you want to root for, a great plot twist, and a final boss character worth fighting. Yeah, this movie straight exceeded my expectations. I may have to see it again.

Check the trailer

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In other news, I'm broker than I've been in a while. As luck would have it, it is sale season, which means that God (gods) hates (hate) me. Diane von Furstenberg's S/S 2008 collection is my dream wardrobe, and it's on sale, yet I cannot purchase any of it.

All gorgeous, all unattainable.

However, being broke can't completely break my spirit, oh no. I went to the Nordstrom on Monday because my friend told me about the designer sale going down. Why did I get a pair of Dries van Noten pumps for two bones? Oh, happy, happy day!



Mine are mostly canvas and a tad bit lighter. I must say, I came up.

"See, Daddy, sinners have [sole] too."